Fanfic Writing General

@Cyborg
 
@Background Pony #DB6A  

@Cyborg  
And what is it?

@Background Pony #DB6A  
After visiting the EQG world, Crystal becomes fascinated with other dimensions, and unexpectedly gets pulled into an adventure through many in this new series
 
The Great Adventure

@Cyborg  
Nice.

@Background Pony #DB6A  
Hey, I got 2 questions

@Background Pony #DB6A  

@Cyborg  

@Background Pony #DB6A
 
You should, since the way this has been going for the last twenty pages is more fit for a PM thread.

@Background Pony #37C1  
This has nothing to do with fanfiction

ok so here is my concept of chapter 3 of my comic series (this is the last chapter but the adventures of the characters continue beyond the comic)
 
censored some parts just in case
 
list of charters:
 
group 1
 
*.Edward hyde/*Henry Jekyll (earth pony)  
*.*Adam Frankenstein (earth pony)  
*.*griffin/ the invisible man (unicorn)  
*.*matthew: (pegasus)
 
group 2
 
*.*Dracula (bat pony vampire/former pegasus)  
*.*Erik (phantom of the opera) (pegasus)  
*.*Thomas (wolfpony/earth pony)  
——————————————————————————————————————————————
 
story concept:
 
Edward and griffin were out on the town hanging out and heading back home.
 
a big, buff, intimidating looking pony comes out and demands money.
 
our two ponies don’t have any money.
 
so the big pony decides to get what they have on them and sell them for money and attacks.
 
it may be two to one but the pony is large and strong so he was able to overpower our two ponies.
 
just as one of them (griffin) was about to get hurt the other one (Edward) found something to distract the big pony.
 
Edward runs the big pony and the big pony run after him (also the big pony has a weapon which is a gun).
 
griffin goes after his friend.
 
while running griffin heard a shot and screaming from Edward griffin yells out his name and runs faster
 
meanwhile, Edward is in an ally due to trying to find a way to lose the big pony but failing
 
Edward saw a shadow of a unicorn and thought it was griffin but it was the bad pony (who was a unicorn)
 
the bad pony wants to get the money but Edward reviles that it was just a bunch of rocks
 
the bad pony got mad and point his gun at Edward but then after realizing nothing happened he saw that bad pony acting strange and ran straight to a wall and hit his back
 
the bad pony cried out saying (what’s going on)
 
Edward soon realized it was griffin
 
griffin punched the big pony unconscious and helped Edward up  
griffin got his cloaths and turned visible again
 
but soon they heard police and ran away (or at least tried to)  
—————————————————————————————————–
 
later at the house things were alright for Adam and Matthew
 
when griffin came barging at the door holding Edward’s arm over his shoulder saying they got to leave due to the police going after them
 
adam and Matthew grabbed as much as they could that was their stuff and brought them to the cart but tried to leave enough space for Edward to rest on
 
they soon ran as fast as they could
 
later they lost the police and found the town from chapter 2 (pasture valley)
 
and went in there  
———————————————————————————————————————————————
 
meanwhile at the house Dracula, Erik and Thomas were living in things were normal the house was being fixed up little by little and Erik and Thomas were getting ready for bed Dracula had not woken up yet
 
Erik tried to fix the doors but does not have the right tools or needles for it Thomas wonders what he is doing and Erik told what he is doing
 
Thomas hope they get the house fixed and Erik says they will because they need to make this place a good home and to protect Dracula as a way to repay him after all he’s done for them
 
Thomas agrees but yawns and tells Erik he’s going to bed, Erik yawns too and goes to bed as well and will finish the doors tomorrow  
———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–
 
meanwhile, adam tries to find somepony to ask to see where a hospital is but there is either not many ponies around or there were too nervous and tried to look for a place but all were closed
 
(most likely just how urgent he sounded and how big adam is he kinda comes off as intimidating there was a lot of pressure so they don’t know where it is, it’s a big town, not everypony knows where it is)
 
so adam tells Matthew to fly up and see there is a house they can stay at so they can look for a hospital and have someplace to stay, Matthew agrees and flies up
 
he soon saw the house where Dracula and the others are at it looked abandoned
 
he tells adam where the house is and went to it
 
they went past the forest and found the house
 
adam unhooks himself from the cart while Matthew and griffin help get hyde out of the cart and into the house
 
adam will find a way to hide the cart, Matthew and griffin take Edward inside
 
luckily the doors were unlocked so they went in  
——————————————————————————————————————————————————
 
Thomas tries to make himself comfortable when he heard creaking from the floorboards there was no pony out yet on the second floor so he looked down and saw griffin Matthew and Edward
 
Thomas was scared but mad that there are intruders so he goes to Erik
 
Thomas woke up Erik, telling him there are strange ponies downstairs, Erik is curious and tells Thomas to show him
 
Erik and Thomas saw the ponies they see one (Edward) was hurt Erik and Thomas felt sorry but they can’t afford them to know about Dracula due to not knowing what they would do if they knew so Erik plans to confront them and tell them to leave and find somewhere else to go Thomas agrees and Erik gets his mask and they both went downstairs  
————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
 
griffin and Matthew heard the creaking of the stairs and saw Erik and Thomas, griffin asked “who are you two” looking confused
 
Erik just tells them they should not be here and need to leave, but griffin says that they can’t their friend is hurt
 
Thomas tells them to find somewhere else to stay but Matthew says all the places they could see are closed and they desperate to find a place to stay and a hospital and they thought this was abandoned
 
Erik tells him is not so they have to go but Matthew and griffin refused (as in they can’t) because they need a place for them and their friend to rest
 
things are starting to look bad as both parties were getting angry when they argue back and forth until Erik and Thomas decided to just try to force them out so they went after griffin, Matthew and Edward (intending to push them out or something)
 
griffin and Matthew thought they want to fight so griffin and Matthew defended them selfs
 
a fight starts
 
there was lots of dodging, pushing and hitting Edward saw this and even though he is in pain, he has to help
 
edward shoved erik and thomas so he can stop them from hurting his friends
 
erik fell and thomas did so too (due to being caught off guard) but erik’s mask fell off
 
edward checked to make sure matthew and griffin were ok but they all were shocked to see erik’s face
 
thomas got really angry and started to change erik saw his mask was off then heard thomas growl erik tells thomas to stop but it was too late
 
griffin, matthew and edward were scared beyond belief they tried to back away slowly (and edward tries his best to walk) while thomas slowly crept up on them
 
 
Erik was worried and tries his best to tell Thomas to stop but just as thomas was about to let out a loud growl and a stomp
 
Adam came to the rescue went in from of this friends
 
Thomas was shocked and Erik was too to see such a large pony, Thomas went back to erik
 
Erik pleaded with them to leave
 
Matthew asked why they have to leave when they just want a place to stay
 
erik “we can’t tell you just leave”
 
meanwhile, voices of arguing went back and forth and Dracula finally woke up then heard the sound and was curious as to what’s going on, he got out of his casket box
 
and saw his helpers and strange ponies, he got angry and turned to most and went straight to them
 
the two parties were arguing so much they did not notice the mist
 
dracula appeared with a gust of wind which blew the two groups away from each other and cried out “ENOUGH!”
 
they both fell or staggered and there was a cry of pain from Edward and Edward’s friends all made sure if he was ok and are suprised to see a vampire
 
dracula stepped in  
———————————————————————————————————————————————————————
 
dracula yelled at them with eyes red and a face like a bat’s and asked why are they here?
 
they explained why they are here, are desperate to find a place and said they won’t bother him, and perhaps they can help him fix the house
 
dracula angry says he does not need any more help and just when he was about to scare them off griffin yelled out wait and that he can turn invisible
 
dracula stopped and want proof, so griffin tries to make light with his magic and show off his invisibility by making his hoof invisible
 
dracula, thomas and erik were amazed (Thomas turned back to his pony self)
 
griffin said “see i can turn invisible. please we need help”
 
dracula thought fast that these ponies could actually be useful
 
so dracula tells them they can stay and will show them where the hospital is griffin and the others all said thank you dracula tells them to show them their cart and they’ll go from there
 
dracula tells erik and thomas to go with him but erik questions this and thomas is confused too while they walk dracula explains that they could be helpful
 
so they went off to the hospital  
—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
 
they went to the hospital and they sent Edward to some surgery room to get the bullet out of his leg
 
griffin, Matthew and adam were worried but dracula asked who they are and what happened to them, having no other choice griffin decides to go back to the house so they can speak in private and does not want anypony to hear them
 
dracula agreed and so they left (Edward’s friends did not want to leave but they have no choice)
 
so all through the night they told their stories, erik and thomas felt a range of emotions but in the end felt sorry for them and are glad they turned good it was the same when they told their stories dracula felt slight pity but was ok when knowing that they turned good, they also explained Edward’s and henry’s history too
 
dracula, erik and thomas also tell their stories and the feelings are the same they know dracula is a vampire so they have no choice but they get his history
 
dracula told them they can stay and pick their rooms but they have to help him if he needs them they all agree and find their rooms
 
–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––
 
(i’m going to go quick here)
 
the next day they went to the hospital to get edward and they saw edward alright, griffin explained they told their stories and they told theirs and dracula let them stay at his house edward was worried but griffin explained everything is ok so he was ok
 
edward showed he was fully healed, dracula and the others are amazed at someone healing so fast
 
somehow griffin and the others convinced the hospital that they can take care of edward while he’s “healing” seeing as that edward was walking better  
dracula, erik and thomas were amazed at hyde’s transformation to jekyll
 
over time they fixed the house and matthew got his mom out of that workhouse, her feelings towards matthew’s friends are the same but still cautious but warms up to them fully over time, thomas will find a building for his business and it will also be their new home but will visit his friends from time to time but for now matthew and his mom lives with dracula
 
before the month ended they went to a place to have a drink and have some fun (matthew’s mom due to not wanting to go to those places and also keeping the house safe don’t worry the doors are locked)
 
griffin saw something and showed Edward
 
it was a beautiful, white coat, black haired unicorn though she was a prostitute but edward went to her becuase griffin thought this could help Edward talk to girls again, Edward was shy but is willing (jekyll understands too) and the story ends there but this opens another one but it will be more single art work and book like reading instead of comic reading
 
sorry for being so long i just want you all to see the story so i know if it’s ok or what needs fixing

@Sparx  
Here’s Dashie  

@Mr100dragon100  
Man I really like this story. I like the fight with that big brute and how in the hospital the two sides misunderstood each other for fairly good reasons.
 
Dracula was kind of a jerk for not let Jekyll be in the building. Glad that Griffin showed their usefulness. It seems Griffin as clever.
 
I really like this concept. And if you detailed more of the plot like how they got to that city or talk about how the mother trudted the other friends in the comic, then it would be even more awesome.
 
Great concept for a comic!

i did not want anyone to be a jerk but dracula is dracula so it makes sense but I just added that he did let jekyll into his house too since he and the others in the house were amazed (jekyll and hyde’s friends already knew)
 
I’ll do my best but the most I do is add that the characters went as fast as they could and found the town but then cut to erik and thomas because is certain details we don’t need to know but I will add either the narrator or the reader actually seeing the processes of adam trying to find help but failing due to it being too late at night or ponies were caught off guard by adam’s size
 
they all have to explain their stories to the mother and I have to let the narrator talk due to already been known and it will be too long to put in but she accepts them but will fully accept them over time
 
they will keep doing this but they will eventually have to write it down on paper so they don’t have to keep saying it and make it into a book

@Cosmas-the-Explorer  
Agreed.
 
 
@Mr100dragon100  
Can’t wait to see more chapters. 🙂

@Background Pony #634B  
well after this one i’m fixing up and uploading there will be one more but the adventures of the characters will still go on beyond the series

@Background Pony #634B  
Got a new fanfiction idea

@Dragon-Phoenix  
What’s the idea?
 
 
@Mr100dragon100  
Alrighty.
 
 
@Sparx  
I like it.

@Background Pony #634B  
the mane plot is where Starlight is practicing a new type of teleportation, and accidentally sends herself to the other end of Equus. Approximately 900 octillion X 900 octillion X 900 octillion groups of 500 million miles away from Ponyville

@Dragon-Phoenix  
Interesting idea.

@Background Pony #634B  
It’s a really really long way away

ok so i need help in titling the chapter 3 story again the basic premise is:
 
two groups of ponies
 
1: running away from somewhere to find a new home due to bad situations
 
2: just ponies preparing for bed and have a task to protect a “friend” and already live in the house
 
they both want the house but eventually, they have to share but they all become friends in the end
 
what should the title be that fits this premise?

@Mr100dragon100  
A Divided House, imo.