Dark Helmet: Fire a warning shot across her nose.
[Warning shots almost hit Vespa’s Benz]
Dark Helmet: Careful, you idiot! I said across her nose, not up it!
Gunner: [lifts helmet, revealing that he’s cross-eyed] Sorry, sir! I’m doing my best!
Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Major Asshole: I did, sir. He’s my cousin. [Major Asshole is also cross-eyed]
Dark Helmet: [to Sandurz] Who is he?
Colonel Sandurz: He’s an Asshole, sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that. What’s his name?
Colonel Sandurz: That is his name, sir. Asshole. Major Asshole.
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Colonel Sandurz: He’s an Asshole too, sir. Gunner’s mate, First Class, Philip Asshole.
Dark Helmet: How many Assholes have we got on this ship, anyhow?
[the entire bridge crew stands up and raises a hand, except for one person]
Bridge Crew: YO!
Dark Helmet: I knew it. I’m surrounded by Assholes. [Closes helmet] Keep firing, Assholes!
I love this scene. ;-)