@Background Pony #54CE  
Thank you. I heard this poem several years ago, but I was never able to remember how it went.

One fine day in the middle of the night  
Two dead boys got up to fight  
Back to back they faced each other  
Drew their swords and shot each other  
One was blind and the other couldn’t see  
So they chose a dummy for a referee.  
A blind man went to see fair play  
A dumb man went to shout hooray!  
A paralysed donkey passing by  
Kicked the blind man in the eye  
Knocked him through a nine inch wall  
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all  
A deaf policeman heard the noise  
And came to arrest the two dead boys  
If you don’t believe this story

Duct tape, the handyman’s secret weapon.