Whass good, niggas?
 
So I finally got round to watchin Equestria Girls. Wasnt nothin fantastic, but it def wasnt the shit show I think we was all expectin. Lookin back on it, it had a couple plotholes and mo than a couple dead-end subplots, but shit was cute and genuinely enjoyable. But I aint here to give you the same review you dirty niggers can read just about everywhere else. Im here fo that sweet, sweet racism.
 
So its true that they aint got no zebras in EqG. In fact, errbody in the movie all kindsa fucked up colors. Its a questionable design choice yeah, but I honestly think the studio made the right decision there. If theyd have gone for realistic portrayals of race, they either had to compromise the canon that zebras correspond to niggas in Equestria for the sake of diversity”, or throw in Zecora, the one token negro in the whole damn show. Either one would make bitches mad, so giving them pastel skin was an elegant solution. Trouble was the human fleshtones on Flash Sentry looked like shit as a pony, but hell that nigga wasnt hardly in the movie anyway. Still better than gettin another goddamn Yamino tryina get the movie released without no nigga horses in it. God damn
 
One other problem Ive heard, not too much but still, is bout the lack of body diversity. Thats the polite way of sayin “how come they werent no fat bitches?” Now nigga that just some bullshit. One thing I dont fuckin understand is this new wave of fat bitches all proud of they curves.” Now don get me wrong, Niggertron do like em thick and soft, but goddamn theres a limit. Obesitys a problem. That shit aint healthy, and I dont see why somethin that shortens yo lifespan should be glorified in media. Sure these cartoon honkeys got impossibly perfect bodies. Theyre motherfuckin cartoons. They supposed to be ideal. Shit you could draw acne and scars and fucked up teeth on them to be more realistic, but who the fuck would watch that shit? Do it make you feel insecure in yo body to see some skinny ass cartoon ho doin shit? Good! Use that shit as motivation to better yoself (Up to a point. Dont need you goin all anorexic an shit). If you ask Niggertron, shouldnt nobody be content with the person they is. Niggas should always try to be better. Always.
 
And nigga if you basin shit in yo life off cartoons, you aint worth takin care of anyway. When i was a lil niglet, cartoons was all about droppin anvils on niggas heads and blowin they asses up with dynamite. Course, I didnt try an drop anvils on bitches heads: half because where the fuck is I gon find an anvil, and half because I wasnt a fuckin retard. So dont go sendin me some study about how these skinny ass bitches in a movie is makin kids have low self esteem or some bullshit. Kids is pretty damn stupid, but they still gon come to the conclusion that bein paperthin and havin eyes the size of basketballs is impossible, just like theyll realize you cant use the magic of friendship to vanquish fuckin winged demons and shit. That last part was a spoiler. Dont read that part if you didnt see the movie yet, or are too damn stupid to pick up on how theyve stopped literally every other villain in the show.
 
Fuck tho, I babblin like a goddamn porchmonkey or some shit. Goddamn I gotta stop typin this shit while Im sleepin. To conclude, EqG was pretty good. Go watch it. Or dont shit nigga I aint even care.