Last night when I overheard that my brother was applying for a new higher paying job, I compared it to my situation and it made me feel VERY bad about myself, to the point where I didn’t get the feeling to go down to eat dinner and when I eventually did, I was gloomy as hell and had very low energy. I don’t know if this is what depression feels like, but it wasn’t great. Luckily, after I laid out my feelings to my mom earlier, I feel better now and she helped motivate me in trying again to apply for a new place. Still, I hope I can never experience what I felt last night ever again