I’m pissed. I feel blamed and I feel like I’m no longer welcome. I am so very tired of the cruelty of others and I’m tired of feeling like no matter what I say, it’ll just be punishment. I’m tired of people shaping me into something I’m not and I’m tired of trying to be funny and nice and at least show a little effort into having fun but even something so small amongst the overall good standing I have, it does not matter. It is as if it’s something personal, maybe because my waifu, or many other reasons that aren’t even nearly as bad as what I could provide by others, people will find something that absolutely offends them. The things I like or the handicaps I may have will be held against me.
Just like how people view me in the real world, how they judge me because I’m young and assume I’m an idiot because others my age goof off and cause trouble. But I’m not allowed to speak about real things like that. I shouldn’t even post this, but you know what, I don’t care. Why do others get that freedom of speech but because of who I am, or who I appear to be on the digital world, I cannot?
I am tired of trying to fathom it. It is not worth my time, nor is explaining it. I do it for myself and to learn from myself by going through these thoughts instead of saying nothing. This is not drama, but this is something I’m upset about and because this thread exists, I will post it here regardless if certain people think I shouldn’t be allowed to. People will refer to my handicap of depression and use that against me, even if I’m not really depressed at that time of conveying a message. It will be assumed and played over and over so long as I continue to be honest and admit I do have problems so openly, while others can pretend under the anonymity that they are perfect.