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Description
This is my first original character.
King Harmodius is the elder qilin king who protects the Qilin Kingdom.
Harmodius was born as the king of the Qilin Kingdom. One day, Harmodius decided to go free flying, mostly to let himself stretch his wings. However, while he was away, Drakhetor, Harmodius’s evil twin brother, sat on the throne, making him king of Qilin Kingdom. As Drakhetor gained the power of the throne, he terrorized the kingdom, concealing it in darkness. Harmodius blamed himself for what happened and sought out for the ponies for help.
King Harmodius is the elder qilin king who protects the Qilin Kingdom.
Harmodius was born as the king of the Qilin Kingdom. One day, Harmodius decided to go free flying, mostly to let himself stretch his wings. However, while he was away, Drakhetor, Harmodius’s evil twin brother, sat on the throne, making him king of Qilin Kingdom. As Drakhetor gained the power of the throne, he terrorized the kingdom, concealing it in darkness. Harmodius blamed himself for what happened and sought out for the ponies for help.
Source
not provided yet
I’m not being harsh, if I was I would say it was crap from the look alone, it’s the story’s huge plot hole that makes it close to crap, I’m being fair here by saying it the backstoy that makes it bad.
It’s the story that make it or brakes it for me, I could over look the OC’s look if the story is good but that story here has gaping plot holes that to me drag the design down even more, making it crap.
Yeah I just looked it up on Wiki.
Does look like bronze.
And no need to be harsh.
Qilin: mythical hooved Chinese chimerical creature
If the story was well written I’d be willing to overlook the OC. I don’t really care about the OC it’s just the story doesn’t make a lick of sense.
I mean is the throne magical? Does it suddenly give you incredible wisdom and power by sitting on it? Can it be used by anyone? Why would you let such a powerful item just be out in the open for anyone to sit on?
And how long exactly was Harmodius gone for? Going to stretch your wings shouldn’t give his brother ample time to bring his kingdom under his heel.
When you write a story you have to really make sure there aren’t such glaring plot holes like that.
Are the shoes, necklace, and hair pen made of bronze?
Wat.