A pirate walked into a bar with a peg leg, an eye patch, a hook for a hand, and a steering wheel in his pants. The bartender asked him, “Hey, does any of that bother you?”
The pirate asked, “What ye talkin’ bout?”
The bartender replied, “The peg leg. Does it hurt?”
The pirate replied, “Nae. Feels good on me kneecap since it be bitten off by a shark!”
The exchange continued. “What about the eye patch? Surely it itches a lot, right?”
“Not at all. Since I accidentally gouged me eye out with me hook, I didn’t have a sty in years!”
“Speaking of, does the hook feel uncomfortable at all?”
“Nae. Chopped off in battle.”
“So I take it the wheel in your pants doesn’t bother you, since the others seem to make you–”
“Aye, it be drivin’ me nuts!!”