(Donnie is resting in a lawn chair, when he suddenly feels the chair rise up)
 
Donnie: Uh… what’s going ON! (Snips and Snails carry him across the deck and dump him on the stage, then Snails runs off) Snip, Snails, what is the meaning of this?
 
Snips: Your doing the Ukulele karaoke, right?
 
Donnie: No. I was relaxing until you two dropped me here! Besides, I don’t even have a-
 
Snips: (hands him a piece of paper and a microphone) Your lyrics! Snails, bring in the props!
 
Snails: (pushes out cardboard a palm tree, a tiki lamp, and volcano) Waikiki! (Drops a fan near him) Your island breeze, Donnie!
 
Donnie: Hold on! I’m completely unprepared to do a solo!
 
Snips: Your backup singers!
 
(Derpy, Desert Sage, and Lyra come in)
 
Donnie: Look, this is more Mikey’s thing.
 
Snails: You know what they say: The Show Must Go On! (To the girls) That’s your cue!
 
(Derpy beats a bongo, while Desert Sage and Lyra play ukuleles. Desert Sage taps her foot to the rhythm)
 
Donnie: But-
 
Snips: Just go follow along, you’ll be fine. (He and Snails walk off)
 
 
[Desert Sage, Lyra, and Derpy]
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
[Donnie]
 
Well, I keep a little turtle at my Uncle and my Aunt’s
 
My auntie’s name is Myrtle, and my island turtle’s name is Lance
 
He doesn’t wander far, even if he has a chance
 
He just plays his ukulele and he does the hula dance! What?
 
[Desert Sage, Lyra, and Derpy]
 
Lance the Turtle! Aloha, Lance!
 
(Mikey dances in, doing a hula dance, while wearing a grass skirt)
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
[Donnie]
 
He threw a luau barbeque one breezy summer night.
 
(Snails turns on the fan)
 
Invited all his turtle pals to come and have a wiki bite.
 
The turtles started walking there as Lance began to swing.
 
The one who lived across the street arrived there in the Spring!
 
Donnie: (speaking) Oh, I get it! Turtles are perceived as slow, so it took him a long time. That’s pretty good!
 
[Desert Sage, Lyra, and Derpy]
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
[Donnie]
 
But Lance just kept on cooking, he was grilling full of glee!
 
He was marinating ribs cause he liked-
 
(While dancing, his lyrics are accidently shredded through the fan)
 
Donnie: Uh… (reading pieces of lyrics) “Syrup with his feta cheese?” I-I’m sorry, I- (Snips and Snails tape up lyrics and give them to Donnie) Lance’s purple turtle shell has ketchup if you please. Pineapples are shiny! Spotted tiki bumblebees?! Oh, man!
 
[Desert Sage, Lyra, and Derpy]
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
Donnie: Wait a minute, guys. I don’t think this is right. It doesn’t make any sense!
 
Snails: It works for us! Ha-ha!
 
Donnie: But-
 
Snips: The song! The song!
 
Uh… There are luscious chocolate fingers, spinning slowly in the school. Mele Kalikimaka. Fluffy bunnies driving in the pool! Uh, Mikey?! A thousand igloos wax the beach, spray luggage in the tree! Raining puppies, flying clowns. Flossing punahele- (comes to a realization) Wait? Mikey, is this another one of your pranks?!
 
Mikey: (still hula dancing) All I can say to that is… Dr Pranknstein for the win! (Runs off laughing)
 
Donnie: (chases after him) MIKEY!
 
 
[Snails]
 
Oh-ho!
 
Alpaca sneezes coconuts!
 
Tahini yo-yo leg!
 
Wahine whisky jelly sauce, don’t make the fuzzy parrot beg!
 
[Snips]
 
Paper, plastic porcupines!
 
The horsey makes his bed!
 
The humu-humu-nuku-nuku-apua’ua wasn’t fed!
 
[Snips, Snails, Desert Sage, Lyran and Derpy]
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
Aloha, Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle, dance-dance-dance!
 
Lance the Turtle! Aloha,
 
Lance!
 
Lance the Turtle!
 
[Desert Sage, Lyra, and Derpy]
 
Dance-dance-dance!
 
 
TriviaRob Paulson voiced Mr Beet in Beauty and the Beet special and voiced Ichabeezer, Bacon Bill, and Motato in Veggie Tales in the House.
 
 
Song “Lance the Turtle” from Veggie Tales.
 
Donnie and Mikey’s cruise attire by TMNTony
 
Equestria Ninja Girls by DarkMagicianmon