“You’re wrong dude, an AT team would destroy a T-80” said a pony towards another one, as they both argued about who would win in a match “Atleast if it’s on an urban environment” he reiterated shortly afterwards, hoping that his friend would understand.

“Yeah, maybe in a city you get a clear shot at a T-80, but I doubt the same would happen in an open field!” the second pony retorted, seemingly willing on explaining his point of view and also hoping that his friend would actually realize what he meant

In a regular scenario, you would think they were two random ponies, and nobody would blame you for that thought, but in this scenario, it wasn’t two regular ponies; it was a gigantic pony and a smaller one. The former, beige for coat, red for eyes and brown for hair, was a tank pony… or… well… infantry fighting vehicle pony, to be more specific. This pony had the hull of a BMP-1 vehicle, pony legs as locomotion, and a turret at the top of his head that complemented his hull design. He was currently discussing with his loader, his big hooves leaving hoofmarks in the sand as he kept on trotting. He knew this desert like the fluffy underside of his hoof, so he wasn’t afraid of getting lost anytime soon, to not mention he had a GPS just in case.

“Well, it also depends on the experience of the AT team and what they’re doing. If they’re somehow hidden and about to ambush the tank, their possibilities grow” the tank pony analyzed, stopping briefly to make a hoof gesture that accompanied his sentence, then continued.

“Can’t we just say that it depends?” The gunner, who was seemingly tired of the argument between both of them, replied groggily, he was pretty much about to fall asleep on his seat, bored out of his mind.

“No!” Both the IFV pony and the loader replied, exasperated of the gunner. Yeah, he was quite good at firing that 73mm gun, but darn he was annoying sometimes, and this was the sixth time he said that comment or something along the lines.

The tank pony meanwhile, kept walking, looking around the landscape, recognizing some reference point that God knows which it was, then continuing forward, the barely recognizable figure of a city at the distance; their destination. They were supposed to arrive at the military base near the city, and just wait for further orders, or atleast, that’s what the tank pony caught in the message, it seems like the other side had the radio damaged.

“So, we agree to disagree? I believe that a well-trained AT team coul-“ he was going to say, but he stopped abruptly when a figure randomly and out of sudden appeared in front of him. He got surprised, and his military instincts took over him as he fired a HEAT shell at whatever it was, hoping that it wasn’t an ambush, and, if it was, to atleast damage the enemy vehicle so he could run outta here.

But what he (Or atleast, his trusty military training) failed to realize, was that they were currently at peacetime, so there weren’t actually any enemies to fight against…

And, when said unnatural creature stopped in front of him and turned, he silently wished he had ran out of ammo before…

It was an Abrams, M1 Abrams main battle tank if he remembered correctly, they were tough, extremely tough, he actually never heard of one that got destroyed by enemy fire, and also quite powerful with their 120mm guns… And, sadly for the BMP-1, this kind of lighting bruiser of a tank was the one he just shot.

The tank pony looked, or more like glared motherfuckerly at him, it… no, she… the eyelashes seemed to indicate it was female, but still, she seemed really pissed at the poor IFV who happened to have an itchy trigger hoof.

She stared at him with her ‘I’m mad’ expression, the barrel of her gun barely poking the ear of the BMP, the markings on it reading ‘Girl power’ (Which confirmed that she was a female) and ‘#Rekt’ as a comedic relief. She didn’t seem to take lightly the fact that now she had a black, rounded and scorched area on her face, under her eye, though it didn’t actually do anything other than just ruin her paintjob with a fresh and tubular ‘Burnt black decal’ on her cheek.

“You… son of a…. b*tch” the real tank pony said, looking at the fake tank pony who was now terrified of her. The Abrams pony gently brushing her burnt cheek with one hoof, then stomping it down to assert dominance over the tiny BMP. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“I’M REALLY SORRY, I-I-I… YOU SURPRISED ME” The BMP pony said, really not wanting to be part of a fight and become another killmark for her, or get added to the list of ‘BMPs that got utterly wrecked by a 120mm DU APFSDS shell’. The tank pony, meanwhile, didn’t seem happy yet.

“You know how hard it is to have this makeup added?! I’m a giant pony! It takes about 5 hours!” The Abrams almost yelled, somehow managing to maintain her temper enough. The driver, loader and gunner of the BMP proceeding to exit, confused by the commotion, and right after seeing that mad Abrams, going back inside with a ‘Oh hell no’ expression.

“I-I’m really sorry! I-I’ll pay you the makeup” The IFV pony said, sweatdrops going from the start of his ears towards his neck, his nervousness being evident as he gave a little sheepish and ‘Please don’t kill me’-style smile towards the tank pony.

“I’m testing new styles with the locals, and making myself presentable, and you little son of a Bob Semple ruined it. For fucks sake, I just got this thirty minutes ago!” she continued ranting towards the IFV pony, which started to back up, scared of his life.

“I…” The tank pony was about to say, but he was unsure what to do, and he didn’t want to say something that could be interpreted like ‘Why makeup, you look ugly anyway!’ and get blasted right between the eyes. “Sorry…” he said, cowering down slightly and trying his best to not look menacing to the bigger and badder tank pony, anyways, he definitely didn’t want this Abrams to go to ‘So anyway I started blasting’ mode.

“Damn it…” The Abrams said, still exasperated about the whole ordeal, but managing to calm herself down. “Control your goddamned trigger you rookie!” she said, her angry expression turning into a stern one. “And you’re gonna pay for the repairs” she added afterwards, pointing at her black cheek.

“I-I… Wilco!” The IFV pony yelled out loud, scared. “I… I’m going to my base…. They might help you there…” He added, trying to get in good terms with this tank pony, or atleast, not find himself on the really bad ‘I’m about to crush you like an insect and use you as a target practice’ term.

“You better hope they repair this! Or else you’ll gonna pay. Now guide me to your base so I can get this done and I’ll think about not destroying you” She said, using intimidation towards the IFV pony, she had calmed by now, but she was still angry that this son of a gun lacked the tank-pony equivalent of trigger discipline and it resulted in a paintjob going to garbage after about 25 minutes of applying it.

“Y-yes sir! I mean, ma’am! Please don’t hurt me!” The BMP pony said, stuttering lightly, as he hurried his pace towards the base he was going to, the Abrams tank pony going along him.

Meanwhile, inside the turret, the gunner laughed for the first time in days as he heard everything, then he let out a little joke towards his loader (And possibly towards the tank pony two) “Now this an interesting scenario; who would win? An Abrams or a BMP-1?” he asked, laughing, the loader looking at him with a ‘You can’t be serious’ look and replying “Are you kidding? We’re going to get fucked up”

A drawing I did because a friend suggested me an Abrams pissed off because they ruined their paintjob (Because a 73mm HEAT round can’t penetrate the frontal turret armour of the Abrams, or atleast, I think that was the joke). In this case, that Abrams is really pissed off but who knows, maybe she’s grateful after they fix her scorched cheek and end up snuggling with the BMP, wouldn’t that be cute? :D

I have a terrible lack of imagination for desert backgrounds, so I’m really sorry in advance for how it looks. As for the tank pones, the BMP-1 has a desert camouflage, and the Abrams is too cool to have one, so she instead is sand coloured all the way.

I wanted to make an Egyptian pony, like the ones that appear in Somnambuland, and I based myself on that for the Abrams, as for the BMP, is a random generic hair and eyestyle.