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JJII
Non-Fungible Trixie -

My pick is a Dolan.  
The Administrator would yell at everyone, but then we just tape up her mouth.  
The Majora’s Mask moon was put into stable orbit already, and is in another dimension.  
Gabe would probably eat all the food but pass out game codes to everyone.
Background Pony #F268
Gaben would eat all the snacks and demand money for new ones.  
The moon would take three days to do anything.  
The Announcer would yell at people with a megaphone.  
Dolan’s a prick. Leave him out.
LordAnubis
The End wasn't The End - Found a new home after the great exodus of 2012

The Administrator would probably just hang in the back quietly.  
The Moon would take 3 days to be a threat.  
Gaben would eat all the food, but he’d bring free game codes for everyone.  
Dolan’s just a dick. Don’t invite him.