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Description
Page 332 - Mr. Welch for PoniesAuthor: ZarhonGuest Author’s Note: “Inspired by Mr. Welch. Who is probably Rainbow Dash in this comic. Or Pinkie Pie. Or both.It’s probably only a matter of time before they have to read this list to Princess Celestia, or she has to read it to them.”Newbiespud’s Note: We’ve got a couple more of these along this theme. They’ll be spread out over the course of this break.
Transcript:
Things the Mane Six can no longer do during an RPG
- A catapult is NOT an adequate replacement or substitute for flying.
- I cannot have a character stay awake or avoid sleep indefinitely, even if the rules allow it.
- No amount of crafting expertise allows me to replace or otherwise substitute the other players.
- I cannot craft my own allies for a morale bonus, either.
- Or for any other reason, for that matter.
- I cannot lose sanity in a setting that doesn’t feature it as a mechanic.
- I’m not allowed to intentionally lose sanity in a setting that DOES feature it.
- Acting insane does not give me a bonus for RPing if I’m not actually insane.
- Being separated from your allies for over an hour is not an argument for instant mental breakdown.
- Not allowed to use insanity as method of intentionally breaking alignment on demand.
- The ‘hunting’ skill is a poor substitute for the ‘animal handling’ skill.
- Not allowed to hunt the other characters, no matter what animal they may or may not be.
- Not allowed to charm, mind control, manipulate, or otherwise enthrall the entire population of a village.
- Not allowed to charm, mind control, manipulate, or otherwise enthrall the entire population of anything.
- Even with the best of intentions.
- Just because I forced the whole town to sing a musical does not mean I can force the DM into doing the same.
- Not allowed to tempt fate, just because I’m bored.
- Not allowed to tempt the DM either.
- Any member of royalty is not to be robbed or mugged on sight.
- Especially not right in front of them.
- Being able to control the weather does not automatically make me a goddess, nor does it allow me to ‘smite mortals’.
- Not allowed to use time travel to skip the DM’s future adventure or plot.
- Or to ‘fix’ the DM’s future adventure or plot.
- Or to make my own custom-tailored adventure or plot to play through.
- Not allowed to use time travel, period.
- Even if doing so would be the moral, righteous, or just thing to do, the laws of physics will not adhere to my demands.
- Not even if I ask nicely.
- I can’t bluff either.
- I am not allowed to bend or manipulate any of the following: Reality, physics, causality, time, the fourth wall, the universe.
- Not allowed to counter-veto, de-throne, or otherwise interfere with the DM either.
- Even if the rules and character sheet says I can.
Oh I see. Heh.
Thanks.
See here.
It’s a List of things the hypotetical person mr. Welch is no longer allowed to do on tabletop RPGs, Be it because they are Absurd, Game Breaking, Too Cliché’d, Uncomfortable, Time Consuming, Unnecesarily complicated, or utterly Ridiculous.
Like, “if my revolver damage is measured in the richter scale, It’s vetoed” Utterly Ridiculous.
“Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG”