Durabiznik

Imagine never getting drunk no matter how hard you try.  
Also imagine being unable to kill yourself after you find out about the above.
Ebonysdagger
Wallet After Summer Sale -
Magical Inkwell - Wrote MLP fanfiction consisting of at least around 1.5k words, and has a verified link to the platform of their choice
Not a Llama - Happy April Fools Day!

Happy Introvert
And that was how Twilight outlived her friends. Drank them all into cirrhosis of their livers. Outliving your friends isn’t dependent on time after all.