Viewing last 25 versions of post by Joseph Raszagal in topic The Continuing Adventures of Medi-Bat

Joseph Raszagal
Wallet After Summer Sale -

Emily Brickenbrackle III
+Chapter Three: The Math of the Gods+

*[Don't even get me started on the sheer insanity that is Medi-Bat's "math" equation, dude]*

"Well, if we take Warhammer 40k, multiply it by a factor of Doctor Who, add the amount of hours you've spent watching the X-Files and reading Star Trek fanfiction-

*[And I'm already lost]*

-and subtract the amount of hours you've spent playing sports, 'cause we both know it wasn't a whole lot-."

Me: *[_OBJECTION!_]* "Hey, I played baseball in high school!"

-and t"Then multiply that by the total circumference necessary to enclose a medium-sized star in a Dyson Sphere, we'll come up with this."

*[Medi-Bat proceeds to show me something that is most definitely not a number or calculation of any kind]*

"And then we take that, divide it by the number of bad Robocop and Terminator sequels, multiply it by the amount of limbs that characters from the entire Star Was franchise have lost, and add a random number between 1 and 1,000,000 to represent how depressed you are that Fallout 76 totally bombed-

*[Understatement of the century]*

-then, finally, we'll come up with what we need."

Me: "I'm almost afraid to ask... but okay, Tiny Bat-friend. I'm trusting you on this one. What is it? What's the answer?"

*[Medi-Bat smiles]*

*[It is _not_ a comforting smile]*

"With all of that out of the way... we come up with the single nerdiest number in all of creation, the answer to absolutely everything that ever was, is, _and will ever be!_"

Me: *[Uh-oh]* "You... you don't mean..."

"I sure do!"

*[As if on cue, a great rumbling begins to thunder from seemingly everywhere all at once. The sheer nerdiness of everything that Medi-Bat just said, the pure power of recounting all that wasted time of mine...]*

*[It's amazing. It's nonsensical. It's a complete and utter joke. But above all else, it's enough to shake the very core of reality and bring it to its knees.]*

*[Like a dark priestess invoking the name of an unholy demon, Medi-Bat mathematically added up all of the greatest and dorkiest moments in my life and came to the only conclusion that a drunken narrative this dumb ever could.]*

"Bow before me and my adorableness, universe! I am Medi-Bat, your new Goddess of Cuteness!"

Me: "Forgive me, Douglas Adams! I was weak! I couldn't stop her!"

"With all of my awe-inspiring might, I invoke The Holy Number and the answer to everything, 42!"

*[Against all odds, we don't die. I know, I'm shocked too.]*

*[Instead, a great shattering sound blasts through The Void and a hole opens up. Though it, the realm of Derpibooru is visible, protected behind what appears to be one more wall resembling a computer screen.]*

*[My God, the psychotic little bugger really did it. Medi-Bat struck through and exposed the 4th Wall, the last barrier separating us from our home.]*

Me: "Bitty-Bat, I can't believe my eyes; you did it! You really did it! There it is, Derpibooru! You're a genius, Medi-

*[I'm struck speechless]*

*[Oh no...]*
Reason: I didn't edit it, the site is lying
Edited by Joseph Raszagal
Joseph Raszagal
Wallet After Summer Sale -

Emily Brickenbrackle III
+Chapter Three: The Math of the Gods+

*[Don't even get me started on the sheer insanity that is Medi-Bat's "math" equation, dude]*

"Well, if we take Warhammer 40k, multiply it by a factor of Doctor Who, add the amount of hours you've spent watching the X-Files and reading Star Trek fanfiction-

*[And I'm already lost]*

-and subtract the amount of hours you've spent playing sports, 'cause we both know it wasn't a whole lot-

Me: *[_OBJECTION!_]* "Hey, I played baseball in high school!"

-and then multiply that by the total circumference necessary to enclose a medium-sized star in a Dyson Sphere, we'll come up with this."

*[Medi-Bat proceeds to show me something that is most definitely not a number or calculation of any kind]*

"And then we take that, divide it by the number of bad Robocop and Terminator sequels, multiply it by the amount of limbs that characters from the entire Star Was franchise have lost, and add a random number between 1 and 1,000,000 to represent how depressed you are that Fallout 76 totally bombed-

*[Understatement of the century]*

-then, finally, we'll come up with what we need."

Me: "I'm almost afraid to ask... but okay, Tiny Bat-friend. I'm trusting you on this one. What is it? What's the answer?"

*[Medi-Bat smiles]*

*[It is _not_ a comforting smile]*

"With all of that out of the way... we come up with the single nerdiest number in all of creation, the answer to absolutely everything that ever was, is, _and will ever be!_"

Me: *[Uh-oh]* "You... you don't mean..."

"I sure do!"

*[As if on cue, a great rumbling begins to thunder from seemingly everywhere all at once. The sheer nerdiness of everything that Medi-Bat just said, the pure power of recounting all that wasted time of mine...]*

*[It's amazing. It's nonsensical. It's a complete and utter joke. But above all else, it's enough to shake the very core of reality and bring it to its knees.]*

*[Like a dark priestess invoking the name of an unholy demon, Medi-Bat mathematically added up all of the greatest and dorkiest moments in my life and came to the only conclusion that a drunken narrative this dumb ever could.]*

"Bow before me and my adorableness, universe! I am Medi-Bat, your new Goddess of Cuteness!"

Me: "Forgive me, Douglas Adams! I was weak! I couldn't stop her!"

"With all of my awe-inspiring might, I invoke The Holy Number and the answer to everything, 42!"

*[Against all odds, we don't die. I know, I'm shocked too.]*

*[Instead, a great shattering sound blasts through The Void and a hole opens up. Though it, the realm of Derpibooru is visible, protected behind what appears to be one more wall resembling a computer screen.]*

*[My God, the psychotic little bugger really did it. Medi-Bat struck through and exposed the 4th Wall, the last barrier separating us from our home.]*

Me: "Bitty-Bat, I can't believe my eyes; you did it! You really did it! There it is, Derpibooru! You're a genius, Medi-

*[I'm struck speechless]*

*[Oh no...]*
No reason given
Edited by Joseph Raszagal