Fetish fuel headcanons [NSFW]

Time for another one of my patented Terrible Drunken Ideas(tm), this is thread for naughty or grotesquely violent headcanons.
 
To begin with one of my own, one of the perks of being a princess is that you can have a harem. Celestia’s is goddamn huge.

Twilight’s dreams are filled with dicks. Everywhere. Even the landscape. It scares Luna.

Spike has an incredibly creepy shrine of Rarity. Rarity had a countdown to when she could say her feelings and not make it weird, but eventually just decided to give it a few years.
 
Luna has gotten to the point where she only really guards the dreams of the innocent. Only can see so much debauchery before it just gets boring in every dream.

@Itsthinking  
That said she does make a point to visit dreams that appeal to her, such as Shining Armor and Cadance’s, which are filled with gay sex. Just… just all of the gay sex. Ever.
 
On that note, Shining Armor and Cadance are swingers who enjoy group sex with a whole lot of guys. That is Shining Armor engages in group sex with a whole lot of guys, Cadance just likes to watch.

Fluttershy has a huge pregnancy fetish and wishes to impregnate every female in Equestria.
 
Rarity is the standard bondage fetish.

Fluttershy loves literal animal porn. As in, animals having sex with each other. She’s even a voyeur in this capacity.
 
Rainbow Dash has orgy fantasies with the entirety of the Wonderbolts.
 
Flim and Flam use their Super Speedy Cider Breezy 6000 to give themselves cider enemas.
 
The reason the guards all look the same is because Celestia magics them to look like one of her former lovers. They are part of her harem.

Shining Armor constantly cheats on his wife with everyone, including his guards and his own sister.

Shining Armor and Cadence have violence fetishes. They’ve wrestled, boxed, sword fought and dueled each other, and then gone on to have mind blowing sex after.

@gasmaskangel  

 
Stable. The opposite sex version of a harem is a stable. Both have origins as types of buildings.
 
Anyway…
 
Big MacIntosh and Cheerilee are both gay, and using each other as a beard.
 
DJ Pon-3’s musical equipment, from her turn tables to her speakers to her Base Cannon, are all based on technology she tried, unsuccessfully, to use to create Equestria’s first vibrator.

All of the mane six are covert perverts to one extent or another.
 
Rarity doodles up porn in between dress making sessions, and also has lots of secret designs that she’d simply die of shame if they ever got out. Most of them involve black leather and lots of straps.
 
Fluttershy secretly writes lots and lots of super kinky porn. She’s actually been published under a pseudonym.
 
Pinkie Pie is into basically everything on the quiet, but she is especially eager for anything that lets her dress up in a skin tight cat suit.
 
Rainbow Dash likes to watch.
 
Applejack dreams of submission.
 
Twilight has the largest porn stash in the history of sapient life covering every possible topic.

@gasmaskangel  
Spike is, of course, responsible for organizing it. Spike himself mostly sticks to the Princess Molestia series, a Druuna-esque series of adventures. He got them from Princess Celestia herself, who has been faithfully been following the series since it’s inception.
 
Princess Luna doesn’t care for the series, but that’s because her caricature is a submissive wallflower. She’s written many angry letters proclaiming that she’s a Dom, dammit.

All beings in Equestria’s ultimate fetish is tentacles

@FlutterLove  
Except for tentacles, which have the ultimate fetish of hands.

@Trickquestion  
That sounds like Sombra’s fetish. Can they make room for The King?

Lightning Dust has a motorcycle fetish and her seat bas a vibrator on it.
 
Gilda has a major vore fetish to the point that she would eat deer whole.

Pinkie Pie’s biggest fetish? Fucking balloons.

Doctor Whooves would never admit it in a million years, but he likes his anus being fondled during a blowjob.
 
I don’t know why the fuck this has been my headcanon for the longest time.
 
@gasmaskangel
 
I showed one of the result videos to my boyfriend and said “I’m fucking scared”, to which he replied “Now, let’s not blow this out of proportion.”
 
I hope you’re happy with yourself.

@And Brother I Hurt People  
I am now.

@gasmaskangel
 
When I told him how horrible that joke was, he called me an airhead.

@And Brother I Hurt People  
That amuses me far more than it probably should.

Why is this in episode discussion?

@Background Pony  
Still pertains to the show in some way.

@Background Pony  
Medic: I HAVE NO IDEA!
 
Twilight and Fluttershy have a crouch boob fetish, in fact they have both magic surgery to make them grow to obscene sizes (nearly touching the ground) and wear magic bandages that becomes hidden when worn to hide them since they have a pocket dimension spell in them.  
Twilight and Fluttershy get together every weekend to have ‘fun’ with eachother’s massive crouch boobs  
I think that went into crazy headcanon territory :P

@FlutterLove  
We’re talking about the sexual predilections of magical talking ponies. Crazy is pretty much assumed from the start.
 
Rarity is really into sploshing. This stems from a larger fascination with destroying or damaging clothing.