Crazy Headcanons

@TheWAMBrony2021
As a person who’s been through military training, drill sergeants or squad leaders being a completely normal human being one time and the actual devil the other time is completely normal.

@Tiger beetle

@Just Wayne
boi buns

@Just Wayne
And when Lightning Dust said, “Try me, Ma’am”, the episode censors Spitfire’s interesting combination of obscene language and invocations of Lauren Faust and Bonnie Zacherle.

@Korora
#releasetheuncensoredMLP

@Just Wayne
Does that also apply to Zipzee, Tiddlywink, and Tra-La-La’s combination of Breezish and Ponish expletives when they find Minty, Dashie, and Rarity in mortal peril at the waterfall in The Runaway Rainbow?

@Korora
Yes, I wanna hear ponies say fuck.

@Just Wayne
Or when Flash Magnus first saw the complete and utter boots of the contemporary EUP Guard in action, and linguists learned some previously unattested Old Ponish obscenities.

Sunny ever since childhood, has dreamt of going underwater or going to the moon or travelling different dimensions. Both to see the wonders of those areas, and possibly meet new peoples and teach them the ways of Harmony.

Hitch always rolled his eyes at these “silly foal ideas” thinking they are scientifically impossible but sometimes secretly he looks up into the sky and wonders.

Rarity gets annoyed when Applejack calls her impractical in her fashion. Rarity thinks her fashion is practical.

@Cosmas-the-Explorer
Isn’t that just Honest Apple?

If the CMC’s are threatened with bodily harm, Gabby becomes terrifying.

@Korora
Mama bird mode activates

After several close calls with undead in very ancient times, crystal ponies burn their dead instead of burying them or leaving them in necropolises. There haven’t been large scale necromancy-related incidents since then.

That cultural practice ticked off Sombra because he’d had more slaves otherwise, and also made him much more defeatable back then because he didn’t have a horde of zombies and skeletons in addition to his brainwashed thralls.

In the crystal war timeline… well, the Crystal Empire still has no undead, but the lands Sombra’s conquering…

Spike wrote everything in G4. It’s real apparently?

@Roseluck
And when that fate befell Hondo Flanks Belle, Cookie Crumbles went insane.

The last thing Derpy said before taking the obsidian orb (she was already running towards Twilight) was addressed to Dinky:
“Go with your Grandma Minty! I’ll catch up if I can!”

Poison joke’s transformatitive properties are a defense mechanism. A herbivore is less likely to graze or stomp on the plants if they’re transformed in a ridiculous way. Also they might develop a fear of the plant, which is also helpful.

The Obsidian orbs are derived from the same minerals as Sombra’s crystals and/or Chrysalis; stone throne. All three allow you either to nullify, soak up magic, or petrify and drain it directly from the victim. Maud does mention different stones take on different properties when exposed to magic and “if you had the right stone, you could rule all of Equestria if you wanted to.”

@Tiger beetle
I feel like the Poison Joke one is actually canon. That makes a lot of sense.

🖕🗣🫂
Guess the episode

Opaline is from Mistmane’s village.

If Pipp made cryptocurrency she’d call it Pipcoin.

@Dustcan
If it were actual currency, it’d be Pipennies.

Flurry Heart was a lonely ruler after too many moons.

Rarity in her fourties was a controversial fashion magnate. She paid her workers fairly high wages most of the time. On the other hoof she also has gained infamy for trying to bust labor unions somethomes through nefarious means.

Rarity claims that excessive labor union power is a ploy from Chrysalis to turn ponies into slackers and make ponies forget the value of good honest work.

Chrysalis Resistance Timeline: Chrysalis tried to wrest some special knowledge out of Pinkie: How to break the fourth wall, and what Derpy’s mannerisms were.