Allow me to recite what i can remember of Steamed Hams. May contain typos.
Well, Seymour, i made it, despite your directions.
Aah, superintendent Chalmer! I hope you’re ready for an unforgettable luncheon!
Holy gods! My roast is ruined!
But what if… i were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Ho ho ho ho, delightfully devilish, Seymour!
Skinner and The Superintendent theme plays
Superintendent! I didn’t expect you there! I was just… stretching my legs on the windowsill! Isometric exercise! Wanna join?
Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?
No, that isn’t smoke, it’s steam! Steam from the steamed clams we’re having! Mmmmm, steamed clams!
Chalmer goes back to the other room while Seymour goes to Krusty Burger
Superintendent, i hope you’re ready for some mouth-watering hamburgers!
I thought we were having steamed clams.
No ho ho, i said “steamed hams”!
You call hamburgers “steamed hams”?
Yes, it’s a regional dialect.
Upstate New York.
Ah. Well, i’m from Utica, and i never heard anyone ever use the phrase “steamed hams”.
No no, it’s an Albany expression.
You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger.
No ho ho, that’s an old family recipe.
For steamed hams?
Well, you call them steamed hams, despite the fact that they’re obviously grilled.
One thing i sho-
Excuse me for one second.
goes into kitchen then comes back
Aaaaaaah! That was wonderful! A wonderful time was had by all. I pooped.
Yes, i shou- good lord! What is happening in there?!
Aurora Borealis?! At this time of year, at this time of day, localized entirely within your kitchen?!
May i see it?
Seymour! The house is on fire!
No, mother, it’s just the northern lights!
Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow, but i must say… you steamed a good ham.