Lewd Talk Thread [NSFW]

I did a very complicated position the other day that could have ended horribly.

Reverse cowgirl while watching a movie

@ᏰᎯᎠᎻᎬᎯᏒᎿ
 
I’ve actually done that a few times.
 
Once while watching Lord of the Rings.

@Zincy  

@Dex Stewart
 
It’s even worse than that. I was cumming in her around the time that Boromir was dying.
 
Rather, fascinating, contradiction.

@Zincy  
I’ll never forget the first time I had sex my friends were watching Legend of Boggy Creek in the next room.  

@Dex Stewart
 
I spent a few minutes trying to think if I could turn “boggy creek” into a sex joke involving anal but none of them really worked.

@Zincy  
 
Bigfoot porn is a thing for some reason.

@Dex Stewart
 
As a hairy man with broad shoulders, I can unequivocally say that some women are all about being ravaged by such a beast.

It’s so weird being a virgin despite having two or three Internet friend with benefits who’ll go fuck themselves if I ask them to. Sure, it’s all dom/sub stuff, but it feels awkward being able to tell someone to choke themselves on a silicone dick until they can’t move their jaw yet being unable to actually get laid.

@GenericArchangel  
Virginity and being lewd aren’t the same.

@GenericArchangel
 
Same skills, different setting. You could get some pussy or dick if you used that kind of persuasive skill in real life.

@Zincy  
But alas, I’ve never had the chance to. Maybe after [current events] has subsided I’ll be able to.
 
@Meanlucario  
I guess so, huh?

@GenericArchangel
 
I’m sure “chances” have presented themselves pre-covid, unless you’re like 16 or something. It’ll certainly be easier post-covid, but even now you can get some ass. I’ve gone through 4 women over the course of the pandemic.
 
Potential conquests are everywhere, you just have to be vigilant and brave. I’ve picked up partners from work, school, pubs, online dating, etc.

@Zincy  
Well I didn’t care pre-COVID, wasn’t really making an effort. Now I do care. I’ll try online dating, see if it gets me anywhere, and the usual “hey I think I like this person I’ve incidentally met”

@Zincy  
And if you have no social skills like me, there’s porn.

@GenericArchangel
 
I’ve actually had fantastic luck with online dating. All the people that shit on it have never tried it.
 
I have, in the last year and a half through online dating, ended up with a black chick with tits the size of my head, a Colombian beauty whose English was hilarious, another black girl with an ass you could land a 747 on, a half white half Hispanic CIA agent, and my current girl who is a cute little Chinese with a heart shaped ass and a lovely rack.

@Zincy  
Lucky bastard

I’d love to marry a lovely woman and do some cuddle fucking.

@Meanlucario  
Cuddling is my favorite.  
I’m such a disgusting freak.

@Dex Stewart  
I just want physical affection that can turn into sex, and I doubt my family would be into that.

I’ve had a few cuddly lovers.
 
I dated a maid years ago who used to do that cute thing women sometimes do. Where you’re napping together, cuddled up, and they push their ass into your pelvis in a not so subtle hint that they’re wanting some action.
 
And my current girlfriend will roll over when we’re cuddling and nip at my neck. It’s how she let’s me know she wants some dick.

So, as someone who has basically “fucked the rainbow”, I can confirm that females of different races are “built” a bit different when it comes to their sensitive anatomy.
 
Which has been an interesting dilemma while dating a smol Asian woman.

@Zincy  
CIA? What the fuck?