All the hassles that come with this new couch my family bought, I hope one of them sneezes messy food on it or worse, so I can say “don’t blame me; I don’t even use that over-price piece of crap”.
(This entire summer has led me to build up more spite towards my household than usual; at this point, I’d rather move up north and pay to live in my older sister’s shed than live with these condescending chuck-fucks)