I’ve gone past the point of desperation, past the point of anger, and now even past the point of hopelessness.
Now I feel so happy to know I’m still here, and I feel like I should focus on pouring love into my many blessings as opposed to ruminating anger at the things that I can’t change (the things I made bad for myself often enough)
I don’t have to be great, and I don’t have to make everyone like me. But I will have empathy for those who I blamed my problems on, and those who chose not to completely dote over all of my actions.
In other news i’ve had no coffee, beer or weed for almost a week. Something tells me I don’t exactly need these things. It’s inevitable that I will get these things when I can afford them but it feels good to feel good without. One could joke that not having my guantlet of drug substance for a week gave me a moment of clarity. I can’t be so sure myself.