Finish each other's sentences

Et?
 
It was me,  
Your…

Ex-girlfriend
 
I’ll have to teach you how to be the…

Best that ever was
 
 
You ever wonder if you could

Make people’s heads explode by concentrating hard enough?
 

 
 
For my next amazing trick, I will

Steal all of your money
 
 
My best job was…

Cleaning babies and bathing old folk
 
The monitors displayed a mysterious…

Website full of naked people
 
 
You what mate,  
I’ll have you know that…

I am actually dead already
 
Sandy Wants to get…

A tattoo then drunk, because you can’t do it the other way around.
 

 
 
Who wants…

To have MAGIC MISSILE TO THE FACE!?
 
I’m gonna draw…

nude ponies
 
I found my power, the one where I…

Make money grow on trees.
 
SNL was better back in…

The Bush administration.
 

 
I love it when my wife whispers things in my ear. Like…

Can I do 69?
 
Bitches don’t know about my…

Crippling social anxiety.
 

 
Side effects of Mexilplexifin may include:

pregnancy
 
Ritualistic sacrifice is…

Not necessary, but can help
 
Sometimes I feel that…

I’m missing out
 
 
I deal with stress with…

A stress cube
 
Kirby gets married to…

Jigglypuff
 
 
Everyone can…

Dance to the Monkees!
 
REST IN PEPPERONI GENERAL…

Store
 
 
The cure to cancer is…

WEED 420!
 
Pringles are primarily for…

when you can’t find real chips.
 
I owe $2000 to…

The library not like they’ll do anything
 
 
I’ll give you three days to…