Corrupt A Wish (Forum Game)

@Any Pony  
The new universe isn’t much better then it already was. Everything is the same, except bananas are peeled from the bottom.
 
I wish for 200 golden bananas. Ohhh banana!

The bananas are pained in gold.
 
I wish to have a truly loyal girl who truly loves me.

She loves you as a friend.
 
I wish to be Mario.

You get defeated by Bowser, who has somehow recreated both the Dream Stone and Dark Stone. Somehow.
 
I wish to have the powers of the dream stone.

You get crushed by a meteor.
 
I wish I were a stork.

You become a stork, but get killed by a raccoon 10 minutes later.
 
I wish i could be a anime character.

Granted. You are some nerd who gets buried in plastic figures.
 
I wish Halley’s Comet returns.

It crashes into the earth.
 
I wish a for a nuclear meltdown in Beijing, China.

It destroys the world
 
I wish i could see a movie of my life when i die

The video and audio quality is terrible and the budget the movie’s on is 10 dollars.
 
I wish Magical Girls were real

Granted. They turn you into one of them.
 
I wish I had a pet Gallus that behaves like a rooster.

He always rudely wakes you up in the morning.
 
I wish I was a magical girl villian.

You get blasted into oblivion although you technically aren’t dead
 
I wish i could participate in a Danganronpa-style killing game (is this nsfw? if so then i have a backup wish).

Granted. You are now an octopus.
 
I wish I lived in a shopping mall.

@HorsesandMuchMOAR  
It’s one of those malls that hasn’t been renovated in ages and has few stores left. Like this one in Arizona, for example.
 
I wish I were earning at least $20 an hour without going under 40 hours a week.

You do. In less of a week you get fired because you’ve became too expensive as a employee.
 
I wish to become Black Susanoo from Blazblue.

Granted. You are just a thundercloud hovering over the Mariana Trench.
 
I wish I can have a pet Gallus that keeps crowing. I love this stupid kind of birb!

He starts shrieking Senbonzakura for some inexplicable reason.
 
I wish i could be able to visit the worlds of the TV shows/movies i love.

They all get canceled thus destroying them before you get enter them
 
I wish I had a light

You got a light that’s always on, so you cannot be covert anymore.  
I wish I could decide what every lifeform is worth.

You finally gain that deciciveness just as civilization, and thus the economy, collapses.
 
I wish my back wasn’t so itchy.

The rest of your body starts itching like crazy
 
I wish i could travel back to the 90s

You do, and you are stuck with the mindset of those generally from that era.  
I wish for the scary elite from fictional worlds to crawl out into this world and call them real.

@Noobicus  
Jedi are fools. Sith.

Granted. They host a tea party and celebrate by flipping every table in the room.
 
I wish I can have a fireproof robot that eats cigarettes.