[Dark] Depression/Suicides within the fandom (The revival)

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I’m such a joke of existence.

@Shylover  
O, i see. Hm. I wish i had friends that exppressed remorse when they hurt me, or feared that they hurt me, everytime they did theyed turn it around and acted like i was an asshole for being hurt, making me feel even worst and constantly left me for weeks on end silencing me for the most miniscule of actions. Despite the fact i had brought them back from the brink of suicide many times then would often say i never helped them. Discrediting everything i did and fuck i hated my life so much, i was in so much pain, the loneliness was the hardest part of it all.

@Carter Resado  
I’m a mentally ill loner. What else is new? I even learned that from the Joker movie. It showed me a horrifying truth of what it’s like to have mental illness. And it’s even horrifying to how much it implies to society and real life, and even from what’s happening these days.

@Shylover
 
Mental illness sucks, but you realize that you have a problem and want to fix it but just dont know how, thats a great first step, and sure you may stumble and fall, but you keep perservering, and thats a good sign, its a sign that youre strong.

@Carter Resado  
I’m not strong. I’m lost. I have no friends in my home state (MO) anymore. And I don’t know what to do. I lost so many friends after graduating. Everyone has moved on except me. Nothing has been the same anymore since 2015.

@Shylover  
Youre still here despite the fact that in your eyes youve lost everything, the wars still going on inside your head and youre still fighting it, you realize its wrong and you havent given into the vices that it demands you take, that is Strong.

@Carter Resado  
I just wish I wasn’t lonely anymore. I hate this. I hate feeling like this. And I can’t even stop crying right now.

@Shylover  
Ik how you feel, though i didnt really have friends when i had graduated as theyed all fucked me over, yeah it hurt but fuck them, they dont know what theyre missing.

@Shylover  
Youre not alone, im right here.

@Carter Resado  
But I’m alone in my state. 😢  
I just wish Flutter_Lover was in my state. I want him to see me as a real person and not seeing me as a bunch of words with emojis. And I’m starting to feel like I’m a waste of time in everybody’s life.

@Shylover  
I dont know you but i dont think youre a waste of time, you were unfairly left alone in the dark, its one of the worst feelings in the world, it leaves you so cold and bitter, and hateful, it consumes you. Its like youre stuck in one place, a cave you might say, a deep dark cave. Youre hurting, but one day, itll pass, but you have to see it, you have to fight, you have to make things change, and when you finally do… Remember the Hurt… The Hurt. Is Good, it means Youre out of that cave

What if I’ll never find my way out of the deep dark cave?

@Shylover  
You will, you might stumble and run into the walls for a really long time, like i did, but i found my way out, you will too, i promise. I had to fight with it for a long time, but it was worth it, im in a much better place, i know it probably sounds like fantasy to you because it wouldve to me as well, but its not, its real and its out there, i found it though i had to do it alone, you dont have to do it alone if you dont want too, ill help you if need be. I really dont mind talking to you, or anyone here, so dont feel afraid to express your frustrations, its okay. I know depression feels like it suffocates you and id always be afraid of just talking about it, im saying this so that hopefully it alleviates some of the weight, i know it wouldve helped me

When I say yup I mean yup.

………………………………..

@Shylover  

 
Hug

@Shylover  
What…?

@Carter Resado  
Never mind. My friend just responded back to me on IG. Thank god. :)

@Shylover  
Did my msg convince them..?

@Shylover  
I hope i was able to help..

.

@Carter Resado & @SaviorAssassin1996  
Personally attacking others is not allowed anywhere on the site. Especially not when you spam multiple threads with the same thing.

@Derpy Whooves  
Sorry about that.

This year has been harsh, oh so blue.  
Sinking like a marsh, you know it to be true.
 
Surely you jest, it will all be over soon.  
Sooner than less, and not scripted like a cartoon.
 
Why so blue?  
You know it to be true.
 
We will find love again.  
We already found a friend.
 
That’s not to say, it isn’t hard.  
Now it’s time to lay down, like a card.
 
This hand I have dealt, will shortly soon lie to rest.  
Let this be known, I’ll get my belt and be the very best.
 
With this heart and this sort of mind, we will not soon forget.  
We will never depart, always be kind, this hand we shall bet.
 
Got a perc, got my scotch.  
Got to lurk, got my crotch.
 
Down the hatch, like a raging bat out of hell.  
We know what’ll happen, motherfucker fell.
 
What do you think? Surely you jest.  
I’d soon think just like the rest.
 
It’s hard to describe, what exactly it is I feel.  
These wounds are scars, they won’t soon heal.
 
Soon it’s possible that anything won’t be felt.  
I need to mask this, but not with a kilt.
 
A cloak of mysteries, everything feels like.  
I don’t know how to hide, I feel like I’m on a pike.
 
Thrown under the bus, it surely feels.  
These wounds as I cuss, surely will not heal.
 
A palmful of percs, a pint of Scotch.  
I’ll be sure to lurk, as I beat my crotch.
 
It’s surely so, there’s no doubt ifs, ands or buts about that.  
Here I go, there is no turning back; I’m no scaredy-cat.
 
Down the hatch, it surely will indubitably go.  
I’ll slug it fast and steady, but not slow.