[Dark] Depression/Suicides within the fandom (The revival)

@Pacific Glow  
No. Thats no good reason to do the unthinkable.
 
In fact, there isn’t a good reason to the unthinkable at all.

@rdibp
 
Thanks Dib, don’t worry, I’m sure everything will be fine, probably it’s just a phase and I’ll be able to overcome it…
 
*hugs back*

I’m slightly under 200 lbs…but I still have this gross flab.

@HighRollerHydra  
That does not sound fat.
 
I’m going out for a while

@warc9  
You know, you don’t need to announce every time you leave. Just do it.

@TheAnonShy  
I honestly do care for your, as well as everybody else’s, well being. Hearing all of this stuff coming from people and knowing I can’t personally do anything other than say “It’s gonna be okay” tears me up inside.

@HighRollerHydra  
warc9 takes it upon themselves to cheer up depressed or suicidal people, something I don’t envy at all. Pretty sure they just wanted to make sure nobody felt like they were being ignored.

@HighRollerHydra  
Because I really care about everyone here.
 
I want them to know I’ll be back as soon as possible.

Bleh I’m getting in a “Whats the point” mood again…

@Corrderio  
That feeling is bad.
 
I’m sorry to hear that.

@warc9  
Meh.

My mother just had a discussion with me and asked me if she could trust me. I refused to answer. As a result, I have even less time on my own now, she threatened to put me into an extended stay mental hospital (again), my nephew is no longer coming to see me for the summer, I am not allowed to go upstairs without being accompanied by my parents. Part of the reason why and I continue to do “the thing” is because I do not like feeling manipulated by my parents or trained like a dog.
 
I would probably try to hang myself if I ever had to enter one of those facilities. Mental hospitals are like prisons, except that the workers treat you like toddlers, not criminals.
 
My mother basically told me that I was an overprivileged brat who needs to help himself but refuses to do so.

@Tranquil Night  
I’m sorry to hear that.
 
But please, do not hurt yourself. I care about you, so does your mother.
 
She is really worried about you and doesn’t want you to hurt yourself.

@warc9  
I care about her too, but I could not stand being a long time in a place like that. I would hate my parents if they put me into one of those places again. I spent most of my awake time hiding from the other patients in my room, and I was still pushed to my limit.
 
WHY THE FUCK AM I ACTING SO IMMATURE?

@Tranquil Night  
You’re being too hard your self.
 
I’d suggest going back to her and saying yes to whether or not she can trust you.
 
And, please stop hurting yourself.

@warc9  
I doubt that my parents would trust me because they already understood the implication that I do not trust myself.

@Tranquil Night  
Then why did she ask?

@Tranquil Night
 
As someone involved in mental health, I take exception to that depiction of mental health facilities.
 
There are certainly some bad facilities, but most are just like any other medical facility.
 
I’m sorry you had a bad experience, but try not to throw all of us under the bus.

@Tranquil Night  
Really?
 
One of the hospitals I was in the people were REALLY nice… exceptionally nice
 
The other hospital the people were still nice… but not much more than I was expecting
 
 
I guess I’m lucky to not have gone to a hospital where they treated you like toddlers

@Zincy  
@Rainboom Dash  
I am sorry. I should not have made a biased assumption like that.

going to bed, goodnight.

@warc9
 
Good Gentle Night to you.

Meh
 
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BwSqPTVShvBlRVR4M283Q25yV2M/view?usp=sharing
 
I’m not a very good singer…
 
I mean… my technique and stuff is HORRIBLE
 

 
_{I know it’s a little distorted… need to learn to move the mic far away when I sing :P}
 
Wow… unable to process video my ass….
 
Guess you’ll have to download… it’s in H.265 format though so play it in VLC or something
 

 
I’ll upload to Youtube too
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdVScB1uTXs

Okay… here’s a song that I didn’t practice beforehand
 
It’s not nearly as good (first time singing it in about 18 months)
 
Got a lot of the lyrics wrong and other shit
 
 
But.. yeah… FIRST time singing it or even listening to it in about 18 months
 
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0BwSqPTVShvBlS2JGdXdfNVVneWM/view?usp=sharing
 
I just encoded it in H.264 this time… it gets about 30% less efficiency but… eh

@HighRollerHydra  
At least you don’t have scars…
 
I was poking around with a dating site, and one of the little fields was “scars”.
 
Yes, I’m just so happy to have disgusting stretch marks and a surgical scar on my belly, I can’t wait to tell every person I may ever date how disgusting I am and how much I should be avoided.
 
Granted, I’ve seen worse, but I’m not exactly going to go swimming without a swim shirt ever again. Not that I ever did to begin with…