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Champions of Equestria

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Description

”Why hello stranger%! Never seen you before%!”  
“That’s a lie if I’ve ever heard one! No pony ever comes up to be unannounced without wanting something.”  
“What kind of ‘something’?”  
“Usually sexual favours… Why am I telling you this, bugger off.”  
“Aww come on, you look stressed, maybe you should chill out a bit more, relax, let me sing to you~”  
“Excuse me? Singing?”  
♫How the hell did you ever pick me? Honestly, I could sing you a song, but I don’t think words can express your beauty~♫  
“Why in the fuck are you singing a fucking love song?!”  
“I, err, why are you asking this? Ponies don’t usually ask what song I sing…”  
“What in the bloody fuck are you saying!?”  
“I, uhh, shit, I should be asking you that!”  
“You’re the stranger who came up to me and started singing about how you find me beautiful!”  
“No, you don’t get it… I… Argh!”  
The unicorn reaches a hoof at the earth pony’s chest  
“Get your filthy hooves off me!”  
“Huh, that’s weird.”  
“What?”  
“I don’t feel a pulse.”  
“…”  
“Do you not have a heart?”  
“I have a heart.”  
“It’s not beating.”  
“No, it doesn’t do that anymore.”  
“So…You’re dead?”  
“No, I’m undead.”  
“Un…. Dead… That means ‘not dead’ right?”  
“No, I’m not dead.”  
“So… You’re alive?”  
“No.”  
“Then what are you?”  
“Oh sod off, I’m a fucking zombie, alright? You fucking happy? Now get the fuck out of my face.”  
“Huh, that’s interesting, and it would explain why my song had no effect on you.”  
“I don’t care, go away.”  
“No, you see, this is really cool! I’ve never met any pony that isn’t put under a spell from my singing!”  
“What part of ‘go away’ do you not understand?”  
“I can’t be your friend if I leave!”  
“…”  
“Come on, gimme a chance! I promise I don’t want any sexual favors!”  
“Fine, you can follow me home for tonight, but if you do anything funny, I’m getting you arrested.”  
“I don’t think that would be possible even if you tried.”  
“Excuse me?”  
“I didn’t say anything.“

 
I made this image as an excuse to make a short story, and an extra excuse to follow it up in the future with a longer one… Nothing deeper than that.

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